Friday Fun

'Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?'
- George W Bush

- Now, in case you're worried that your kids will slip into some form of laissez-faire Bohemian liberalism this summer since school is out, you will not be forced to ask 'Is our children learning' if you send them to this site. (That cannon thing might poke their eyes out - or yours. Not recommended for young children or the current POTUS.)

- Here's a handy trick to turn your kids into little Schwarzenggers.

- Courtesy of the Ponoka, Alberta police blotter this week (best police blotter ever!):

This week a woman discovered that if you mix certain non prescription pharmaceuticals with a single malt scotch you can talk to the devil. The upside is that you can do a Flip Wilson and blame your resulting bad acts on “the ol’ Prince of Darkness”. The downside is that you may find yourself in distasteful predicaments while trying to prove your “state of possession”. For instance, when she was deposited in one of our drunk tanks she allegedly found herself being directed, by the Tempter, to drown herself in the nearest available body of water ... which in this case is the toilet bowl.
read on...

- Boo was late for a date, apparently. And ants have pedometers. Who knew? And, frankly, who even thought about it enough to investigate it? I need a job like that (minus the evil leg amputation part).

- I wonder if Barbara Walters ever throws stuff at the teevee.

- It's a long weekend. According to the teevee, you have three activity choices:
1) stay home (and maybe burn a flag or two or, at least, a steak that's in the shape of a flag)
2) go camping, only to endure the absolutely ridiculous traffic to then find you can't get a damn campsite because you were too stupid to reserve a spot.
3) buy furniture (See: a veritable plethora of annoying commercials telling you that you don't have to pay anything until 2025) Who doesn't love spending holidays in furniture stores with annoying salespeople?

- There's a University of the Incarnate Word? Who knew. Not only that, I guess they think the New York Times word is definitely not incarnate.