Tuesday, May 16, 2006

You're a Possible Incubator - Act Accordingly!

I'm 46 years old and, if I lived in the United States, my doctor (if I could afford to see one) would be telling me to avoid cat poop. Sorry. I have two cats. That's impossible.

What's the deal with the cat poop, you ask? Well, check this out:

New federal guidelines ask all females capable of conceiving a baby to treat themselves -- and to be treated by the health care system -- as pre-pregnant, regardless of whether they plan to get pregnant anytime soon.

Among other things, this means all women between first menstrual period and menopause should take folic acid supplements, refrain from smoking, maintain a healthy weight and keep chronic conditions such as asthma and diabetes under control.

While most of these recommendations are well known to women who are pregnant or seeking to get pregnant, experts say it's important that women follow this advice throughout their reproductive lives, because about half of pregnancies are unplanned and so much damage can be done to a fetus between conception and the time the pregnancy is confirmed.

This is ridiculous on so many levels. Where do I begin?

I have nothing against being healthy, believe me. I actually would be healthy if I wasn't chronically ill, but that's another story. But, to expect all women to live in pre-incubator condition (as one blogger calls it) is just asking too much from women. I certainly wouldn't want my doctor to be telling me to take folic acid when I don't need it and I wouldn't be the fall guy/woman for the fact that the US health care has failed mothers, fathers and babies miserably with an enormous infant mortality rate that probably has more to do with a screwed up health system and a lack of interest in funding in pre-natal care than it does with unhealthy human incubators who just somehow prefer to maintain themselves as damaged goods because they want to harm any offspring they might eventually have.

"Forever Pregnant"? Are you flipping kidding me? I had my child a very long time ago and I don't plan on having another one anytime soon, thank you very much. To be treated by a doctor as some potential pregnant woman every time I visited their office if I was an American woman would be an insult. It would be intrusive, unnecessary and a waste of time and resources.

If the US government wants to address issues around pregnancy and infancy, let them do it properly with an actual plan. This notion that all women who are of child-bearing age should be treated as some monolithic group of patients is just patently absurd and sloughing off the responsibility on women's shoulders without seriously addressing systemic failures in the health care system is yet another example of this so-called 'personal responisbility' agenda that the Republicans push at every single opportunity they can think of. Until, of course, it comes time for them to take their share of that responsibility. Then, they're nowhere to be found.

Women should also make sure all vaccinations are up-to-date and avoid contact with lead-based paints and cat feces, Biermann said.

The minute you come up with a cat poop patrol of volunteers who will visit the homes of every woman of child-bearing age across the United States on a regular basis, Ms Biermann, make sure you put out a press release. The human incubators are waiting.

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