Bill Clinton is a Cheap Date

Unable to compete with the head-rushing excitement of CNE thrillers like the Tilt-a-Whirl™ and the ever-enticing Whack-a-Mole&trade, it looks like Canadians in the big commie city of TO just have better things to do than to pay 5 bucks to see Bubba.

Ticket sales for Bill Clinton's speech Saturday at the CNE have been much slower than expected, forcing organizers to reconfigure the stadium layout and offer fairgoers $5 tickets at the door.

About 7,000 advance tickets are sold for the 4 p.m. event, a far cry from the 25,000 people expected when it was announced two weeks ago.

“I'm the eternal optimist. I thought we were just going to sell like crazy at the very beginning and it looks like we're going to sell more towards the end of this sales cycle,” said David Bednar, general manager of the Canadian National Exhibition. “I can almost guarantee that we will not sell out.”

(To be fair, I know there's not much that could pull me away from the Whack-a-Mole™ either. Maybe they could stick Bill in a box with a few holes? Just a suggestion.)
 

The next time you eat onion rings...

...or carrots...you may (or may not) want to remember this bit of Freudian Vegetable Analysis brought to you by law professor Ann Althouse (who also stunned the blogosphere with "Let's take a closer look at those breasts" - not to mention this little meltdown caught on video.)

So, tell us all about those onion rings in the new Hillary Clinton ad, Ann.

4. Bill says "No onion rings?" and Hillary responds "I'm looking out for ya." Now, the script says onion rings, because that's what the Sopranos were eating in that final scene, but I doubt if any blogger will disagree with my assertion that, coming from Bill Clinton, the "O" of an onion ring is a vagina symbol. Hillary says no to that, driving the symbolism home. She's "looking out" all right, vigilant over her husband, denying him the sustenance he craves. What does she have for him? Carrot sticks! The one closest to the camera has a rather disgusting greasy sheen to it. Here, Bill, in retaliation for all of your excessive "O" consumption, you may have a large bowl of phallic symbols! When we hear him say "No onion rings?," the camera is on her, and Bill is off-screen, but at the bottom of the screen we see the carrot/phallus he's holding toward her. Oh, yes, I know that Hillary supplying carrots is supposed to remind that Hillary will provide us with health care, that she's "looking out for" us, but come on, they're carrots! Everyone knows carrots are phallic symbols. But they're cut up into little carrot sticks, you say? Just listen to yourself! I'm not going to point out everything.

On c'mon Ann. Knock yourself out. We'll wait.

Don't forget to order some vaginas and penises the next time you're in your favourite restaurant. Tell them Ann Althouse sent you.